The surest way to lose

For round 4, I had to play one of my bogeymen - Mark Littleton (170/1888) with Black. My loss a year earlier had been a shocking display, and in general I just seem to always go wrong against him! In our first game I lost from a clean piece up in a Richmond Rapidplay, which triggered a collapse from 2/3 to 2/6 - for a 138 in an U-170, that hurt a lot. But this encounter might well take the biscuit.

Though it might sound like sour grapes to invoke the p-word in another loss, I do feel that, like in the game against Kalavannan, my failure was mostly a psychological one. How else can one contrive to lose such an endgame as this?

Whenever someone asks me before a game what the best way to get a draw is, I answer "play for a win!". Playing for a draw makes your play too negative, and that is a step on the road to defeat. I don't know why I was so sure that I was after a half-point before the game; I should know better and usually do. The draw was easily within reach almost all of the way, but I was too impatient, and when I made my move it was not there.

What makes it really disappointing is that my opponent will continue to play in such a deplorable way if it produces results! It's so galling to follow the tune so closely; you feel used in such circumstances. Games like this are what gives chess a bad name.

Thankfully, my last two games turned out to be much more interesting - perhaps because I was back to playing juniors on the final day. Firstly was a game that I had to regard as must-win, but knew would be tricky.